Keeping Secrets is Tough!

Gifts are a funny thing to get your head around when you’re four.  There’s a whole lotta rules associated with them.  Including the dreaded “must keep it a secret” rule.

Keeping something of that excitement level from someone you love is flipping hard!  A fact evidenced by my daughters level of secret-keeping when it come to her father.  A gift for anyone else?  No problem.  She can keep that secret.  But a gift for her Dad?  Not on your life.

I had thought we were doing really well.  She knew back in November what she wanted to buy Damon for Yule…  and I knew it was something we’d never find locally.  So we began our online crusade for this holy grail.  We hit big chain websites, we hit small merchants, we hit etsy, and ebay…  all the standbys.   And we found exactly what she was looking for.  We actually spent about a week browsing through online shop after online shop – and she kept it a secret during all that time.  We ordered the item, and waited for it to arrive.  And still her secret she kept.  She did great!  Right up until the day the package arrived.

“Daddy I got you something to hold toothpicks!”

Damon returns this announcement with shocked silence.  Me on the other hand?  I burst out with “Lily!?!?  That was a secret!”

“It’s okay Mom, I didn’t tell him what colour it is or how it works.”


And then today, when we got back from picking up a piece of what I’d been planning for the last month…  she lets that surprise slip too.  We had picked up a couple other pieces we’d had printed at the same time, and with her Dad right there (and knowing the third item was a Yule gift for him) she asks “…but Mom, where’s the other one?”

“Lily-Ann…  shhh…  the other one is a present for Daddy.”

“…but where’s the one of us all where we look like pirates?”

Again Damon greets this with stunned silence.


So, like I said.  The politics of presents can be tough to master…  especially when the gift is something you find really exciting and it’s for someone you love.

Sorry Damon.  Guess the cat is out of the bag, on both accounts.

About Tobi-Dawne

Tobi-Dawne Smith is many things to many people... photographer, canine behaviour expert, equal rights activist, green politician, lactivist, intactivist, writer, crafter, dog handler, third wave feminist, etc. But most important in her life is her role as mother to an amazing five year old. Learn more about TD at follow her blog at get to know her daughter at or check out her work at

Posted on December 18, 2011, in Family, Joy Journey, Just a Note, Parenting, Wee Girlie and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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