The big move is only four sleeps away. The girl says she’s excited about it, and I believe her… but I know she’s feeling some anxiety too – even if it’s below the surface. The way she’s cuddling in extra tight at night, and has been keeping me awake (even though she’s fast asleep herself) the last few nights tells a very clear story.
We are all excited… but it’s tough to leave your home behind. For the girl, this is the only home she’s ever known. For us “grown ups”, it’s the longest either one of us has ever lived in one place. Nine and a half years isn’t so easy a thing to shrug off.
All the anxiety and stress though? I have a feeling it will melt away once we walk in the front door of our new house. After all, we wouldn’t have chosen it if it hadn’t felt like home the minute we had walked in the first time we viewed it. And it did. It really did. So I know we’re leaving behind a home we love, but we’re gaining a home that I think we’ll come to love even more. 🙂
Okay, ya got me. I’ve been kind of a lazy blogger lately. My posts aren’t really sounding like me, they are short and not nearly as engaging. Yeah. I know.
The fact of the matter is, with everything on my brain lately, I’m just not quite myself. I’m stressed about the house… packing up and leaving this place behind is tough. I’m super excited about the new place and what it will mean for our family, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that this is our home. We got engaged in the bathroom. We first talked about having a baby sitting in this bedroom. We’ve lived lots of places together, Damon and I, but this was the first one that was home. Nine years here. It’s a hard thing to walk away from, even if the place no longer meets our needs.
So yeah. With the house on my brain, it’s hard to think of much else for long enough to blog about it. …and I’m guessing you don’t want to hear me posting about the house every day. 😉
We take possession one month from today. We already have so many boxes packed that it’s tough to move around in here. We haven’t got even a small portion of the packing done yet. There’s more than one reason we stayed here nine years (even though the intention was about three years when we bought the place). LOL
It’s a good thing. This is going to be such an amazing thing for us. But that doesn’t take away from how difficult it is.
That said, here’s something cute and fun:
We’ve been reading Medusa the Mean (yep, another book in the Goddess Girls series). Lily-Ann absolutely LOVED chapter 7, Kindergarten Buddies. Of course, being IN kindergarten herself probably had a lot to do with it… though it was a super adorable chapter that made her giggle and grin repeatedly (especially when she realized that there was a crush starting between Medusa and Dionysus, and then further imagined her Daddy as being like Dionysus and herself as Andromeda). So tonight, before bedtime, she decided to draw Medusa and Dionysus – as inspired by the Goddess Girls books and the cover illustration of Medusa the Mean. And for a five year old? I was darn impressed. 😉
I was thinking about the title Friendship is Magic, and while it may not really be magic, it can grant you mental health – which is pretty darn close. Friends keep you grounded, they kick you in the pants when needed, and provide support when no one else can. A good friend is like having a mental health provider on your speed dial. And that, my friends? That really is magic!
I’ve been stressing out about this whole ear issue of mine (and if you could hear the voice in my head, you’d note I said issue in the very proper British form where you hear the S sound vs the American ishu which is why it appears in italics. Because while I’m Canadian, and we SHOULD pronounce everything in the proper British way, American English has ended up rather prevalent. So you KNOW I’m taking pains to bring attention to a word when I pronounce it – even in my head – properly). I’ve been worrying about the possibility of long term effects, and whether or not I’ll be able to continue with some of my very favourite things. My health has taken a lot from me over the years, and the idea that something else may be taken away is a whole lot to digest. When I brought this up with her, she reminded me that while some of my symptoms may be explained by the Eustachian Tube Disorder (and therefore possibly scary and somewhat permanent) that the severity of these same symptoms could be related to other related problems that are just as likely temporary. Which means while I’m taking a break from one particular favourite activity right now, that things may still get better and I may be able to get back in the saddle (as it were) before too terribly long. Without a good friend in whom I could confide, I’d still be stressing myself into a tizzy. I still have a twinge of worry, but I’m definitely feeling better. Friendship is Magic when it comes to Mental Health!
Oh! See http://howjsay.com/index.php?word=issue to hear the difference in pronunciation. 😉
It’s a pretty sad state of affairs when the treatment makes you more sick than what you’re treating, but that’s the way it goes at times. So, let’s see. Time to backtrack.
Last night (sunday, july 15th) I started a new antibiotic.
Thursday (july 12th) I went back to the mediclinic and was diagnosed with a perforated eardrum due to infection. I was told to give the current antibiotic a couple more days, before trying another that was prescribed at that time.
Monday (july 9th) I was diagnosed with an infection in both ears and prescribed an antibiotic, which I began taking.
Sunday (july 8th) I was unable to sleep as the pain had escalated and had become excruciating.
Thursday (july 5th) I had a slight earache that I attributed to an oncoming cold.
Yep. That about sums it up.
So from a slight earache, to being in bed on a second set of antibiotics who’s side effects are so bad that it’s worse than what it’s treating. Seriously! The NORMAL side effects for this particular medication are: vomiting, diarrhea, nausea, stomach upset, headaches, and “changes in taste” (which translates to a really foul taste in the mouth starting about 1/2 hour after taking a pill and for a few hours thereafter)… All that in addition to the pain in my ears, the dizziness, the feeling of being underwater, the difficulty hearing, ringing of the ears, and the thunderous effect of pretty much any sound echoing through my head.
I’m going to give this antibiotic 48 hours, and if we don’t see a noticeable improvement in the symptoms from the ear infection? Well, it will be back to the mediclinic for me. And all this while I’m supposed to be preparing for my daughters fifth birthday – and that’s the part that bothers me most. I am so stressed that I won’t be well by then. Her party is this Saturday. I haven’t sewn her dress, or crafted the party favours. I haven’t made the decorations or the pinata. Time is winding down, and I simply must be better. I can deal with being sick… as someone with Fibromyalgia and it’s counterparts (TMJ and IBS), I’m used to chronic pain and illness. But the idea that I might not be well enough to finish her party preparations or to even be present in a real way for her birthday? It’s a little too much to consider.
So while I joked about the “ear troll” when this all first started happening, now? Now I’m genuinely concerned. My baby girl is going to be FIVE, and I simply have to be better to celebrate with her.